Today is our “gotcha day”.  As I mentioned in a previous post, we are not celebrating this day – we’ll celebrate the finalization date instead. But its a significant anniversary nonetheless.

At this very moment, one year ago, M and L flew into our lives.  It was everything we wanted and nothing we expected.  And today, while its easy for me to remember the stress I felt, and imagine the fear they must have felt, I am going to choose to celebrate.  Celebrate their growth as individuals, and our growth as a family.  Celebrate the miracles, large and small.  Celebrate the healing that has occured.

I will never forget the jumble of emotions of that day.  But I will choose to celebrat that on THIS day, the healing began for M and L, and our journey as a family began as well.

A year ago, our M and L’s lives were being turned upside down – and they didn’t know it yet.

The decision had been made by their foster parents and their adoption agency that their foster parents were NOT going to adopt them – yet M and L still thought they were already in their “forever family”.

The decision had been made for M and L to move to our home – but M and L had no idea who we were.

The therapist was planning to tell them the bad news – they thought they were just going to therapy.

Their sister thought they would be together forever – she didn’t know she was about to see them only a few times a year.

The 21st is our “gotcha day”.  In many fost-adopt families, this is a happy day.  The kids have been waiting in placement, waiting for their forever family.  And when they move into their new house – even though there’s still a ton of issues to work out – there is a sense that they are finally “home”.

Not in our family.  In our situation, M and L had 24 hours notice they were moving (there’s a lot of good reasons for that, too lengthy to discuss here).  Can you imagine what that was like for them?  Going from thinking they were “home” to being told they were getting a new family?  Imagine if that happened to you, right now.  Seriously, try to  imagine a social worker telling you that your current family just isn’t working out, and tomorrow, you’re getting a new one.  As crazy as that situation would be, at least as adults, we have learned ways of coping.  Now imagine you’re 5 and 6 – how do you cope with this sudden change?

One year ago, M and L’s lives were turned upside down.  And as much as I love them, as much as I thank God daily that I get to be their mom, I must never forget what they went through to become my kids.